Relationships and Letters...

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post on being intentional in our relationships. (Click here to read the post.) In that post, I mentioned that I was focusing on one person in my family each day to help strengthen, grow, encourage and affirm them. It was a lofty goal...a needed goal..., but I really struggled with actually being able to always take the time to pull that person aside and have one on one time with them, and, being human, I have to admit, that many days I would lose my focus and just out and out forget to take time with that person. I am excited to say that God gave me a wonderful idea which I have begun implementing. It has worked so beautifully for me. So, I thought I would share it with you.

A very simple idea, really....Each morning, I pray specifically for that one person (see here for the method of praying I am using for all my kiddos and my mister), and then, at the close of my quiet time, I write that person a letter. It's usually a fairly short note, but it lets them know that I am praying for them. In the letter, I always mention several things that I love about them, tell of the ways that I see God using them or thank them for things I have seen them do. Then I tell them one thing that I am praying about specifically for them. My kiddos (and even the Mr.) have LOVED this. They think it's so neat to wake up with a letter from me once each week. It has also been a great way for me to kind of "journal" with and about them. (I always sneak the letters back and put them away in a safe place! :) )

I leave the letters on what is supposed to be a wire photo holder, but we have always used it for our "mailbox." I hope to advance to something a little more elegant than notebook paper in the near future, but for now....it works! :)

This has worked beautifully for me, but I do realize that not every one enjoys putting their thoughts on paper the way I do. I would encourage you to find what works for you. Be creative. Ask God to give you an idea. The big point is to be willing to take a few minutes out of the day to do whatever it takes to focus on relationships. We humans have become so busy with life that we forget that the entire reason we were even created by God was to have a relationship with Him! Relationships are extraordinarily important to God. Jesus spent his entire ministry focusing on relationships. We need to follow His example and make the time to develop our relationships so that we can share God's love and grace with the people God has placed in our lives. I would love to hear of ways that you are taking the time to be intentional with the relationships God has given you.

An Exciting Discovery!

Just a quick post to pass on something that I came across today! I have been trying to figure out a way to pray more consistently and intentionally for my Mr. and my kiddos. THIS is PERFECT, and I am SOOOO excited about it! So, I had to share it with you, too! :) Click on the links below, and then let me know what you think of this!

A Prayer Calendar for Your Husband

A Prayer Calendar for Your Children

A Challenge for the Month of Love :)

I love the month of February because it's the "love" month! Yes, my romanticism can soar high during this month! :) I thought I'd share with you something I am going to try during this love month. On Saturday, I am going to sit down and think of five different things to do each week of February to show my Mr. that I love him. I'll lay it out on the calendar like I do on the Monthly Family Fun page (here). Some of the things I've thought of that I can do are cook his favorite meal, write him a love note, fill his truck with balloons, schedule a date night, watch his favorite movie with him, etc. I'm excited to do this for the man who does so much for me! Maybe you would like to take this challenge with me? Be creative and think of things you know your man will love! Let's have fun planning a month that will make our Mr.'s feel very special!

A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband... ~Proverbs 12:4a

A Creative Date Night

Last week, I published a post entitled Habits for Falling in Love Again. This post received more hits than any post I've ever published before. That leads me to deduce (maybe not so correctly - the Mister does insist my logic is usually faulty) that either A) there are a lot of women out there who want to fall in love again and keep their marriage strong; or B) there are a lot of men out there who wish their wives would fall in love with them again! :) (I tend to lean toward deduction A!) :) Every time I hear of someone who is going through a divorce, my heart breaks. I don't want to judge - it's not my place - but I can't help but ask in my heart, "Did you fight for your marriage? Did you do every thing, EVERY LITTLE THING possible to make it work?" I have found that nothing good ever comes easily, and marriage ranks right up there at the top! A good marriage is hard, HARD work!

As I mentioned in that post, the Mr. and I haven't had much one on one time since the arrival of our little one, but I have determined that I am going to be creative and do the best I can to give us a date night tonight. I have "hired" my 8 year old daughter to "babysit" the little one tonight. (The great thing about hiring an 8 year old is that you don't have to pay in money; you can exchange services. She's babysitting for me tonight, and tomorrow, I'm going to do her nails and experiment with a new updo for her hair!) So, the 8 year old is going to watch the newbie, and the other 4 kiddos WILL play nicely in their rooms! (I know this will work... I'll make it work!) :) The Mr. and I are going to sit in the living room and have lots of uninterrupted conversation (Yeah, right!) and attempt a game of Monopoly!

Ok...so, is all this going to happen just like I'd want it to? I'm sure it won't. Will it be the perfect date night? Ummmm.....no! So, what's the point? The point is I'm showing my man that I love him and that I am willing to put everything else aside and make time for him! I'm showing him that I'm trying to be his lady and that I want to be his lady. After all, if I wait for the perfect date, will it ever happen? There will always be a reason not to have a date night (no money, no babysitter, no time...), but I want my mister to know that I love him, and I love our marriage, and I'm not going to be guilty of not doing everything I can to make this the best marriage ever! I can tell you from experience, marriage is WONDERFUL - the best thing that ever happened to me - but it is HARD WORK! So, ladies, be creative and have a great date night with your man. And if you have a minute...share some of those creative ideas with me!

Habits for Falling in Love Again

Sometimes life becomes....well, life....In other words just plain busy with the everyday chaos, and then, just for fun, we add a little more extra chaos! In the busyness of taking care of my kiddos, preparing meals, keeping a somewhat clean house, making sure the kiddos are actually learning something in this thing called homeschooling, and even strengthening my relationship with God, I sometimes put one person at the very end of the line for the littlest bit of leftovers. That would be my mister. For those of you who know my mister, you know he's very easy going, quiet and laid back. He enjoys being by himself (I know - I can't fathom that either!)! And so, it is easy to give, give, give all day to the ones who are more vocal about their needs and then have nothing left for the quiet steady man.

Don't get me wrong. The mister and I are the best of friends, and we make a wonderful team in this crazy raising of five kiddos (or should I say raising of five crazy kiddos?)! With a new baby on the scene, though, we haven't had a lot of one on one time. I read this post on Ann Voskamp's blog yesterday and thought it was wonderful. If you don't have time to read the entire post, scroll down to the very bottom where she placed the 4 minute marriage habits that will change your marriage. They're very easy to do and really will make a difference in your marriage! I noticed that habits 1 and 2 are ones that my mister and I already have, but I definitely could use some work on number 3! Click on the link to see what you can do to make sure your steady man knows you love and appreciate him! God gave us a wonderful gift when he gave us our misters. Let's not lose them because of too much busyness.

Making Your Valentine Happy!

I love holidays! Any day to celebrate something is a great day! I realized, though, that on holidays, I tend to look for what people will do for me. Every holiday should be a mom's day off, right? Unfortunately, my mister is not a big fan of holidays. He could do without them all and would never miss them, I think. So, after 10 years, I'm beginning to realize that holidays are for celebrating the special people you have in your life and finding ways to show THEM they are special. This morning, I got up early and decorated our kitchen, made a special valentine for each of my family members, and put a treat bag beside their place. Then, I made heart-shaped waffles for breakfast. The kiddos loved it! (Unfortunately, with all the extras they also thought it meant a day out of school, too!)

Another thing I have come to realize in the last few months is that in my goal of trying to be a great mom, I tend to forget my most important priority of being a great wife. And wouldn't you know it...that was exactly the subject in our last mommies' meeting! (Our church has this once a month for all us mommies who are in need of some sanity!) I really enjoyed (well, except for the convicting parts that I need to work on) the way our pastor's wife reminded us of all the different roles we as wives have. I thought I'd share them with you.

As wives, we are to be our husband's helpmeet - his completer, his helper. We need to keep our schedules flexible so that when he needs us, we are there! We need to respect and trust our husbands. Show that we support them and stand behind them. We are to be good stewards of the money our husbands entrust us with and good managers of the home he has provided for us. (That would also include training the young heatherns so that Dad actually enjoys being with them!) We are to submit and obey our husbands. Wouldn't you know it? You can never name the roles of the wife without naming this one, but it is an important one - and one given to us by God. I always remind myself that the same definition of obedience that I give my kiddos applies to me in obeying my husband. Sometimes, that doesn't set so very well, but...it is what it is, and it is what makes a marriage work! The last role we discussed was that of loving unconditionally - no strings attached. Spending time with him just because, taking time to do things that he enjoys, showing him in ways that he loves that you love him and only him.

As you can probably guess, I've had a lot of things to evaluate and examine these last few days, and I've found several things that I need to change and work on. But, I'm hoping, that by doing these things, I'll make my mister and my marriage very happy! :)